


The New Face of Villainy Never Looked So Innocent

by RosePeer



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: Crack, Crossover, Gen, He's still a baby because its funnier like this, Reborn is a bastard baby, Reborn is reborn, and theyre good people, and well mukuro too, but they dont mean to, chrome is the normal one but shes also kind of crazy, dont question my humor, in which Tsuna's guardians are more trouble than they're worth but he still loves them, kind of, lambo has an infinite supply of grenades, the plot kind of goes up in flames, tsuna and co are villains, tsuna has half the mind to think he's a cloud
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-07-23
Packaged: 2019-10-10 00:33:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17415560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RosePeer/pseuds/RosePeer
Summary: Tsuna and his guardians plus Reborn are thrown into a new world. Chaos ensues and “Yes, Dame-Tsuna this is according to plan.” The plot goes up in flames, and no one is really ready for it. But Tsuna has long since given up any sort of normalcy, so as long as the world doesn’t burn to- oh never mind there it goes.





	1. Sawada 'Driftwood' Tsunayoshi

Tsuna’s not exactly in the best of moods when he wakes up in the middle of the ocean on a piece of driftwood with his guardians somehow fighting above the ocean water, ignoring all laws of physics as sparks flew and dynamites went off.

Tsuna ignores it, choosing to lay on the drift wood and be one with the ocean, watching clouds drift by as though the chaos happening around him isn’t real. Like his whole life isn’t real and he’s just a Tsuna-drift-wood going wherever the ocean takes him.

But of course even that isn’t allowed because a powerful exchange between his Mist and Cloud guardian sends a strong shockwave, that flips his driftwood over and he is unceremoniously tossed into the water.

Instantly, because Gokudera has an innate Tsuna sensor, Gokudera’s head snaps in his direction, dynamites that he threw earlier going off behind him as he screeches, “TENTH!” Before his head snaps to his Mist and Cloud. “OI PINEAPPLE HEAD, ANIMAL FREAK, WATCH WHERE YOU’RE AIMING YOU MADE TENTH FALL INTO THE WATER!”

Then in a gravity defying feat, Gokudera is by his side like he didn’t just run over water like Jesus himself.

The fight between his Storm, Rain and Sun seemingly over with Gokudera’s withdrawal, causes his Rain and Sun to go towards him, once again ignoring gravity. His Rain laughing and sauntering his way over with no care in the world, and his Sun jogging kicking up water behind him like a torpedo.

“Haha calm down Gokudera-kun,” Yamamoto said sheathing his katana. “No need to get mad. I’m sure they didn’t mean to.”

“That was an EXTREMELY amazing spar! Are you EXTREMELY okay Sawada!”

“DON’T TALK TO TENTH SO-“

Tsuna sighs cutting in before Gokudera could finish. “I’m fine, Gokudera-kun, Onii-san. Where is-”

Then his intuition acts up, and he tilts his head to the side where a bullet just barely misses grazing his left earlobe and instead hits the water a fair distance away causing an explosion.

He scrambles to get back on the drift wood to not be washed away by the newly created tidal wave. But that ends up not being a problem when Gokudera picks him up, bridal style, and flies, literally flies, into the sky.

The rest of his guardians follow suit including Mukuro and Hibari who stop fighting in the face of a tidal wave.

He ignores the wave of embarrassment from being picked up by Gokudera and instead turns to where the bullet was fired. He sees his tutor relaxing on a yellow donut floatie with chameleon patterns on it.

In one hand, he’s holding a coconut with a striped red straw stuck into it, looking, for all intents and purposes, like he’s at resort rather than the middle of the ocean. In the other, he’s holding his gun lazily as though he didn’t just fire an over powered round at his own student.

Even when the wave reaches him he remains unruffled, the floatie somehow managing to not be engulfed in a way that only make sense because it’s Reborn’s floatie.

“REBORN!” Tsuna screams more to scream then to sound admonishing or surprised. It’s high pitched and very dame- which is to say in character.

“Dame-Tsuna control your guardians and stop flailing. You’re a mafia boss now.”

Tsuna nods without thinking. At this point it’s second nature to agree even when his tutor asks for the impossible.

Reborn throws around ‘control your guardians’ as though that’s something he can actually do on a regular basis, which it isn’t. Even if he were Primo himself, he doubts he would be able to rein in that level of crazy.

It must count for something that he can keep them in check when it’s important. Except he knows that it doesn’t because Reborn is Reborn and anything less than perfection might as well be trash.

He sighs under his breath, pushing down any and all feelings to focus. Just like Reborn said, he really does need to stop flailing.

One last time he glances at the driftwood regretfully thinking, ‘that could have been me.’

Then he scans the area because Lambo and Chrome are missing, and his intuition was telling him they are here, wherever here is.

It’s not an unpleasant feeling, so he knows that they’re safe at least. And since they're the least problematic guardians (or at least Chrome is the least problematic), they could get on... without causing trouble (??)

His intuition does the equivalent of laughing at him in the face, and he sighs.

He needs to find them. For the sake of his sanity and hands when Nono, the kindly grandfather appearance he liked to take on being a complete and utter lie, ultimately sends him the paper work his guardians accumulat because they rake in a lot, and apparently, Nono was tired of it, his successor’s guardians or not. (And what better way to punish them then to punish Tsuna. Tsuna hates his life sometimes.)

But before he can go full ham on finding Lambo before he undoubtedly blows everything up in his general vicinity, he checks on the rest of his guardians.

His eyes land on Reborn, more as a habit than actual worry (Reborn might as well be made of diamond and backed by Satan himself with his inhumane strength.)

His floatie is heading their way, metal boosters emitting flames that power the movement at a comfortable pace, as he kind of twirls looking all too comfortable in middle of the ocean. He realizes that the upgrade must be how he stayed afloat in the face of the tidal wave.

Then he moves on. His eyes rest on each of his guardians, making sure there are no injuries. Idly, he spots their matching boots. They are metallic, and he’s pretty sure they’re new and also not normal because the air around the soles is distorted like something under immense heat would be.

He realizes, rather late because he was probably too willing to think that his guardians defied gravity through sheer force of insanity, that that’s how they walked on water and flew.

Then it hits him; they were prepared.

They. Were. Prepared.

All of them were in on this.

They all knew that they were going to land themselves in the middle of nowhere over a big fat ocean where the boot would be useful, and they didn’t tell him.

He instantly feels angry and betrayed because they were /his/ guardians. Then he sharply turns to Reborn, anger at the tip of his tongue.

But Reborn is holding up his gun, aiming directly at him, while taking a long sip from the coconut in his hand, practically daring him to lash out. He rethinks pretty quickly after that and ends up tripping over his words.

“W-why are we here, Reborn?”

Even Tsuna thinks he sounds mousy and _god, he is pathetic._

Reborn grins. It’s a sharp nasty thing with too many teeth, and it's a smile that has more than once appeared in Tsuna’s worst nightmares.

“We’re here to train, Dame-Tsuna.”

A shiver runs down his spine. Apparently, it could get worse.

But because he’s a mafia boss and NOT because Reborn is sitting right there pointing his gun at him, he doesn’t respond to that nightmare of a sentence.

Instead, he turns to his guardians or rather, tugs at Gokudera’s arm and motions him to turn towards his guardians and puts on a serious face (as serious as it can be when he’s still being carried bridal style by his now preening Storm.)

“Mukuro try to get in contact with Chrome. I have a feeling Lambo is with her,” which is to say that Lambo is definitely with her.

He turns to look at Gokudera, a frown on his face as he says, “I trust you have more of those boots.”

It’s comes off more sarcastic and clipped then he intends, and when his Storm stiffens, he instantly feels bad.

“Of course, Tenth,” he says with less enthusiasm than normal when at any other time he could be of use, Gokudera would be bouncing off walls.

Tsuna sighs and pats his Storm guardian’s arm, an apology in the gesture, which he knew his Storm would be able to decipher. Gokudera straightens instantly. Any hint of his previous depression gone like it hadn’t even happened in the first place.

“I’LL GET IT ON YOU RIGHT NOW, TENTH-SAMA!”

His ears ring, but he figures it better like this than the kicked puppy act.

Then Gokudera yanks his shoe off with his right hand somehow balancing Tsuna in his left, and because Tsuna’s life is a walking joke, the shoe flies towards Hibari who cuts it in half with his tonfa.

The prefect growls at him. He fights his immediate reaction of squealing.

“Omnivore, I will bite you to death.”

Tsuna curses. Why was it always him? He didn’t even throw the shoe.

Yamamoto laughs like Hibari isn’t basically exuding death and scaring all aquatic life within a 25 meter radius of him, but Tsuna can see that it’s a little strained if only because Yamamoto is running out of his Cloud’s war path. (Since when did his Rain have self-preservation skills.)

Ryohei, not be left out from whatever this was, yells, pumping his fist in the air.

“LETS GO ON AN **EXTREME** RACE IN THE SKY!”

Tsuna actually feels his soul leaving his body when the prefect charges at him, and Gokudera, always determined on his tasks to a fault, doesn’t notice anything amiss and yanks his other shoe off, discarding it in the same direction as the livid prefect who proceeds to tear his poor shoe into pieces.

“Kufufu the Vongola Intution lives up to its history,” his Mist chimes in, seemingly having finished his conversation with Chrome and not caring about his bosses' strife in the slightest. “The cow is indeed with Chrome. They landed on a beach around the same time as us. It shouldn’t be far from here.”

He barely registers the information because Gokudera still hasn’t noticed the Cloud heading their way, too busy emptying his pockets by throwing his dynamites into the ocean because he can’t find his ‘precious Tenth’s boots.’

“GOKUDERA,” he screeches, “RUN RIGHT!”

This snaps his Storm out of his stupor, and he runs just as quickly as the words leave Tsuna’s mouth. Another bullet whizzes past him and Gokudera, and Tsuna only just barely holds back a scream.

Reborn’s words reach his ears even with the distance, and he doesn’t have to look to know that Reborn’s eyes are glinting in sadistic glee.

“Control your guardians, Dame-Tsuna.”

Tsuna knows for a fact now that Reborn only says that as an excuse to join in on the chaos and watch Tsuna scramble. His tutor is truly, truly a bastard.

With one last will of seriousness, he yells, “TO THE RIGHT, EVERYONE!”

Then he drops his half-boss facade and screams unabashedly.

“HIEEE!!”


	2. Scapegoating With Your Dying Will

 

Tsuna and his guardians plus Reborn land on the beach where Chrome and Lambo are happily sunbathing. It’s a little unnerving to see Chrome just sunbathing there when there’s so many other things she could be doing like panicking.

It makes him question the firm ‘normal’ he ranks her in on the demonic to insane spectrum that his family falls under.

Tsuna always trusts Chrome to sympathize with him and nod a solemn ‘Boss’ in his direction whenever everything undoubtedly goes wrong, but at this point, he’s not so sure anymore. Like a true traitor, she looks way too relaxed, sunbathing there in a purple one piece with sunglasses over her eyepatch. Clearly, she is taking this, whatever it is, in far too much stride than Tsuna would have liked for someone under the ‘normal range.’

Lambo, on the other hand, is living up to expectations splendidly. Upon seeing them, he whines about candy, holding out his hand expectantly at Tsuna before they even manage to land. He is still a brat, but at least, he hasn’t blown anything up yet. 

Tsuna ignores him and jumps out of Gokudera’s arms to push his Storm out of the danger, that danger being Hibari who hasn’t given any leeway in his chase.

Lambo cries, but it’s not something he has to actually deal with right now.

Then Yamamoto attempts to ease the situation. Holding up his hands disarmingly, he says, “Maa, maa, Hibari calm down. Tsuna didn’t mean to throw his shoe at you.”

Which is first of all wrong, because Tsuna didn’t throw anything at him and second of all, did his Rain want him to die? What was that terrible excuse?  

And it was terrible because in response, Hibari only releases a new stronger bout of murderous aura which shouldn’t be possible for any form of human being, but his guardians don’t ever apply to the rules of reality so was he really expecting anything.

Then Ryohei walks in between the prefect and Tsuna, like a man who fears no god. He grabs Hibari’s shoulder, ignores his Cloud’s killer intent and gives him a blinding smile.

“EXTREMELY calm down Hibari! Sawada is EXTR-“ Hibari slams his tonfa into his Sun’s stomach, sending Ryohei flying into a flood wall, before he can even finish his sentence.

Tsuna watches him go and flinches at the hard impact, quietly praying for Ryohei’s soul and adding himself into the prayer for good measure.

He watches Yamamoto and Gokudera attempt to intervene at the same time, which only leads to Yamamoto accidentally cutting Gokudera’s dynamites in half, defeating the purpose and setting Gokudera on a revenge spree against Yamamoto who laughs out a “Sorry.”

He side steps Hibari’s jab and in his periphery, sees Ryohei, not unlike a mummy, revive. In seconds, his Sun is up and bouncing around.

“A real man EXTREMELY announces when they are fighting!” Ryohei jumps, literally, into the battle covering 10 meters in a single jump.

Then it’s every man for himself as Tsuna quickly fishes out a Hyper Dying Will pill and swallows it, avoiding another swing from Hibari’s tonfa.

He vaguely recognizes that Chrome, Mukuro, Lambo and Reborn are now holding a tub of popcorn, all seated on their respective lawn chairs (except for Lambo who is in Chrome’s lap) and enjoying the show.

He’s too busy to curse at them because Hibari at this stage of anger is not something to take lightly even with Tsuna’s own hack of an ability.

He spends what feels like a century dodging and blocking, earning him bruises on his right and left forearm that probably color the entire front of his forearm an ugly shade of purple. Throughout it all, Hibari’s hits only get more precise and cutting, each blow connecting with more force than the last, and Tsuna knows it’s only a matter of time before Hibari catches him, especially when Gokudera, Ryohei and Yamamoto don’t bother pulling any stops and send remnants of their battle in his direction.

Ryohei’s punch sends a couple chunks of broken concrete which Tsuna dodges via head tilt. The concrete then meets its end with Hibari’s tonfa where it kind of just crumbles like a cracker.

Gokudera litters the entire beach with dynamites which is more than a little distracting, and Yamamoto almost calls on the entire force of the ocean before he drops it and laughs, probably realizing that /that/ was way too much force.

He wonders if his guardians actually do want to kill each other. But he dismisses it quickly enough because even if Mukuro likes to deny any attachment and Gokudera pulls out his dynamites at any slight provocation and Hibari is Hibari, they still love each other. ~~Right?~~ And they wouldn’t, of course not. Not even on accident. Well, maybe on accident, but that doesn’t change the fact that they’re a family.

This mass destruction continues for a while. Until he hears the blaring sires and sees the flashing lights that indicate the arrival of law enforcement.

As late as it is, it still happens a little too fast compared to the usual Namimori reaction time (or lack therefore of), but he doesn’t know if that’s a show of the Namimori Police’s incompetency or something else entirely.

Hibari backs away, glares at the uniformed men stepping out of their cars, and leaves promptly, the jacket precariously balanced on his shoulders bellowing dramatically.

Tsuna sighs in relief. He is thankful for the everything that the law has done for him, but that doesn’t stop him from trying to make a break for it which is an upsettingly quick and easy decision for him to make, even when he, in the comfort of his own mind, considers himself a law abiding citizen.

But of course, ‘trying to’ is the key phrase because Reborn, the bastard riding on Mukuro’s shoulder, turns around and everything slows down.

He sees Leon turn from a striped red and white tub of popcorn to a small rifle. He sees Reborn balance it on Mukuro’s shoulder in less than a second and align the shot in even less time. He sees Reborn’s finger pulling the trigger and sees the dart leave the barrel.

His intuition stays silent as the shot hits his forehead and sends him hurtling into the ground.

He hears  “Take the fall with your dying will,” “TENTH!” “Tsuna!” and lastly, “I WILL EXTREMELY REMEMBER YOUR SACRIFICE, SAWADA,” before he passes out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was going to have more, but I decided to put it into the next chapter because I thought this was a good place to end.


	3. Get out of jail free card ???

When Tsuna wakes up, he’s shackled to a metal table. In front of him is a tired looking policeman with a cup of coffee.

He smiles at the policeman hoping that he’s at least partly embodying a bit of that ‘mafia seduction’ Reborn talks about it.

The police officer gives him a dry look.

“Do you understand why you’re in here, young man?”

He can’t really remember the state that the beach was left in, having been too busy dodging Hibari to look at the collateral damage, but flying concrete and dynamites didn’t really create a pretty picture in his head.

_So maybe destroying property… or worse, terrorism?_

He blanches at the thought, and his head slams against the metal table in anguish. He immediately starts to panic, thinking about how this could get worse or how it /will/ only get worse.

His mind jumps to life in prison with a 20 million yen bail. He imagines himself rotting in prison, lonely, beaten and taken advantage of by the inmates locked up with him.

Tsuna knows that he’s not prison material. He would die within seconds of entering the facility. He is scrawny, and hell, he still gets bullied in high school. There is no way he was going to last in a den of hardened criminals.

Then reality snaps back at him, and he remembers Reborn and his guardians exist. And he realizes there’s no way he’s staying in prison for long, which, as nice as it sounds, is not comforting at all.  

In the event of him actually going to prison, his guardians would break him out in the most obvious way possible via bombs and dozens of unconscious or worse dead prison guards.

And then he would become a national criminal plastered all over Japan. And all his classmates would wonder if Dame-Tsuna was always an insane felon, and Kyoko-chan would stop talking to him. And he would be on the run for the rest of his life. And he would drag all his guardians down with him. And his mom-

Tsuna suddenly feels a weight on his shoulder, accompanied by a long sigh that isn’t coming from him, which snaps him out of his well-imagined prophecy.

“Look kid, I know you’re being bullied.”

He wants to say ‘WHaT’ but instead he chokes on air and just gives the police officer a pathetic look.

The officer shakes his head, clearly having made his own conclusions. “You don’t have to lie to me, kid,” the man’s eyes turn to his feet, “What happened to your shoes?”

“A-ah my friend took it off…”

The officer sighs again, and there’s a strong look of pity in his eyes. “Those guys aren’t your friends.”

Tsuna feels weird, sitting here in a police station being told that he’s being bullied by his first ever real friends after (maybe) being punted across Japan by Reborn.

It’s like- the police officer couldn’t be more wrong and yet somehow more perceptive then anyone in Namimori ever was or cared to be. It’s a situation he probably wished he could have found himself in back in middle school when he was miserable and actually bullied. But at this moment, he doesn’t feel grateful, he feels weird and maybe a little annoyed.

Tsuna wants to say that they are his actual, honest to God, friends. He wants to say that that’s not what he meant. Gokudera didn’t take off his shoes to torment him, and he wasn’t being bullied by Hibari, and they didn’t use him as a scapegoat on purpose, and several other things because clearly, the police officer was coming to some wrong conclusions about Tsuna’s life.

But his intuition tells him to shut up, so he does just that.

“Next time something like this happens, report it. Using your quirk without a heroes license is illegal. I’m going to let you off this time because you seem like a good kid, but if I catch you again…”

He trails off, but Tsuna didn’t need him to say more to know what he means. Tsuna is a dame, but he’s not /that/ stupid. So he just nods stiffly and probably a little too much, and the police officer pats his head, a little too awkwardly, but he takes it because it’s definitely better then prison time.

The officer unshackles him, and Tsuna stands up. The officer motions for him to follow but stops, looks at Tsuna’s feet again and smiles. “Lets find you some shoes in the lost and found.”

Tsuna is taken to a storage closet filled with an assortment of random items, and he somehow fishes out a pair of matching flip flops. They are the only matching flip flops available with the downside being that they are a bright ugly shade of pink with jelly fish patterns on them, but Tsuna will take what he can get.

With new flip flops to his name, he’s out of the police station in record time. Again, he basks in the glory of this place’s police station’s efficiency.

He briefly also thinks that maybe Reborn did have his interest in mind because Tsuna knows for sure that if this was Gokudera (or really any of his other guardians) there was no way they were getting out of the police station that fast.

Now that he’s out, Tsuna’s first course of action is to find his guardians and thoroughly question Reborn on where they are. This time with zero interruptions and … being persistent. Hopefully.

It’s takes him about ten whole steps and a lot of internal turmoil before he finally decides to stop ignoring a glaring problem.

The thing is Namimori is a pretty oblivious town. He recognizes that, embraces that, is sometimes thankful for that especially when he’s trying to hide the fact that he’s mafia when his guardians are the way they are.

And to be fair to this weird place, Tsuna already had an inkling that wherever this was wasn’t Namimori.

But even the Namimori residents can notice when someone is clearly not human which only means that literally any other Japanese person of not Namimori-origins can do the same and would already be aboard an airplane to the nearest other country before a Namimori resident would even think something was mildly weird about a monster-person.  

So Tsuna really, really, wonders how any Japanese person of not Namimori-origins could miss something so obvious.

He stares at a little girl with buffed up arms covered in scales, her blonde pigtails giving him whiplash because that really did not fit the image she currently had going for her. She’s holding hands with a 6 foot lizard man, acting like a normal little kid in broad daylight and succeeding because no else seemed to care.

It’s weird, and he’s kind of scared and maybe he should just run back to the police station and hide out for a while. Or maybe he should just go back to that piece of driftwood in the ocean and try his hand at that again.  

But before he can put into action any of those great plans, he feels a heavy hand on his shoulder (not friendly by the buzzing of his intuition), and he turns around to see a giant rock man in a black middle school gakuran.

He blinks a couple of times and rubs at his eyes because was the giant rock man really wearing a middle school uniform.  

The rock middle schooler (??) grabs both of his shoulders and moves into his personal space. “What the fuck are you staring at? Do you have a problem with mutant quirks?”

Tsuna frantically shakes his head and stumbles back, even though he has no idea what rock middle schooler is talking about. But he has heard ‘quirk’ before when the police officer was telling him off.

He just didn’t understand what the officer meant and honestly Tsuna thought, the officer used quirk as in ‘oh your quirky habits,’ which didn’t make sense, but Tsuna, at that point, was just glad to be not going to jail.

Unfortunately for Tsuna, his frantic head shaking was not convincing enough because he is then picked up by the collar and snarled at. Tsuna shakes like a leaf in rock middle schooler’s hands.

“People like you-“

Whatever he wants to say is cut off when a dynamite flies through the sky and explodes in midair right next to the guys face so also in Tsuna’s face.

“TENTH!”

Tsuna feels his intuition ding and tenses up, but honestly, he isn’t that surprised. This chaos is so typical in his life that he almost feels numb.

_Here we go again._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is so late... I genuinely had half of this written back in January, but I didn't like how it flowed so just stopped. And now I'm back after four months and was able to fix it so it was less /ugly/ but whatever. I'll try to actually update this because I love the KHR gang.


	4. doN't sToP BeLiEvIN'

Tsuna doesn’t ask for much. He likes to think he’s a good son to his mom, and he’s a pretty reasonable person (if not the only reasonable person in Namimori.) And he tries his best constantly to embody normal.

But obviously, no matter how good he is, the world is against him, refusing to grant him even a second of reprieve.

After Gokudera blows up Tsuna and rock-middle-schooler’s face and safely secures Tsuna,

The civilians scatter, and a string of police officers materialize from the depths of the police station Tsuna just got out of.

Running in just close behind Gokudera, Yamamoto conjures up his rain flames, dousing the army of police officers in blue flames before anything can come from their intimidating number of people.

“You almost lost me there Gokudera.” He pauses for a second before smiling cheerfully, “But it’s just as I thought those eyes of yours are really sharp. You should join the baseball team.”

Gokudera ignores his rain and punches the rock-middle-schooler in the face, sending him to the ground. Tsuna spares a flinch and wonders how Gokudera did any sort of damage to an actual boulder.

Rock-middle-schooler’s buddy, who is also wearing a black gakuran and looks normal except that his back is lined with very visible spikes, looks offended but also very scared because he stumbles to the ground and flinches away from Gokudera.

At that moment, Tsuna really feels for him, as he distinctly remembers being in that exact position when he met his storm for the first time.

Gokudera doesn’t bother with Spikey. Instead, his storm turns back to Yamamoto and clicks his tongue. “Shut up and grab Tenth. We need to go back to base.”

Without any fanfare, Tsuna is then picked up and thrown over his rain’s shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

He feels a little indignant about being regarded as some sort of package, but he quickly sees that his narrative is a lost cause because Gokudera seems to be in full rescue mission mode.

He settles on tired acceptance as he always has, rolling with the punches like it really isn’t a big deal.

“Base?” Tsuna asks as he squirms in Yamamoto’s grip. His rain’s shoulder really wasn’t the most comfortable thing when it was digging into his stomach.

“Reborn-san secured an abandoned building for us, but I refused to rest until we found you, Tenth.”

At that last part, Gokudera tenses like he’s ready for praise, and Tsuna can see a picture of a wagging puppy overlay Gokudera for just a second before he snaps himself out of it.

Not even slightly out of breath as he breaks out into a sprint next to Gokudera, Yamamoto gives a hearty laugh. “It’s that base we’ve always wanted, aye Tsuna.”

“Um… yeah sure, Yamamoto,” Tsuna agrees half-heartedly.

He can’t really rest easy after Gokudera said Reborn has “secured” a building. Knowing Reborn, Tsuna wasn’t so sure that it was abandoned to begin with. He just can’t imagine Reborn sleeping on hard concrete when it wasn’t explicitly necessary.

Something about this thought, makes his hyper-intuition coo. The coo is sort of like when a mother watches her child take their first steps- and it only confirms his fears.

He feels a sinking feeling in his stomach, and it’s not because of Yamamoto’s shoulder.

Everything seems to catch up to him at this moment (just like how the police will, his mind throws in just be an asshole.)

Gokudera detonated a bomb in the middle of the street, Yamamoto attacked an entire police force, and Reborn perhaps stole an entire house and there was still his sun, cloud and mist doing god knows what.

He takes a deep breath which earns him a questioning “Tenth?” and “Tsuna?” from his guardians that he doesn’t respond to.

Deciding to roll with the punches yet again, Tsuna shoots his fears into a giant recycling bin at the back of his mind where his dead worries have been piling up for the last few years. Rest in peace, another bit of information Tsuna didn’t want to deal with. You will not be missed.

Slightly better after ignoring his problems, Tsuna readjusts himself again to be as comfortable as he can be as a current sack of potatoes. “How far is it now?”

“I’m sorry Tenth, it’s still a little while longer.”

“Can I at least run by myself?”

He feels just as pathetic saying it as it sounds.

He can’t get the image of him being a kid out of his mind. Seriously, he’s like a kid asking to push the cart at a grocery store, and he wonders what he did to deserve this.

Sure, he was a useless kid, didn’t really help with the chores, but not because of lack of trying.

He literally just couldn’t. Every time he tried to wash dishes, Murphy’s law would beat him up with a baseball bat, and he’d break 10 dishes, the sink and the kitchen cabinet, so yeah, that wasn’t his fault.

But he didn’t do anything to deserve being here, asking for permission to walk after being sort of kidnapped which happened after being used as a scapegoat and getting captured by the police which happened after teleporting on top of an ocean and learning that his guardians had conspired against him.

It’s so sad. He might as well throw in a mini-funeral for his terrible life too. Rest in Peace, Tsuna’s life. You will be dearly missed.

“Please, Yamamoto,” he asks again, equally if not more pathetic than the first time he asked.

And this time, Yamamoto stops running and squats closer to the ground so Tsuna can get off. “Ah yeah Tsuna, here let me just-“

And just as Tsuna is about to disembark from the Yamamoto-train, his head starts pounding like crazy and, Gokudera yells, “WAIT! KEEP RUNNING BASEBALL-IDIOT!”

A man made of bark jumps down from the top of building in the sketchy alleyway they’re going through.

One of his elongated branch-arms is stabbed straight through the brick building keeping him suspended with support from his branch-legs.

His other branch-arm snakes around Tsuna’s torso and snatches him out of Yamamoto’s loose grip.

Tsuna holds on for dear life, realizing that it doesn’t just look like a branch. It’s an actual branch. That’s moving. On a humanoid looking person tree thing. Who’s probably sentient.

But that’s not even mildly important because Tree Guy whips his sturdy arm. And Tsuna sling-shots through the air, carrying the momentum with him.

He can’t think about anything else when he’s focusing all his energy into screaming before he flops, not unlike a fish, straight into someone’s buff arms at the top of one of the brick buildings at the side of the alley.

“What?” Tsuna says because that’s all he can say as his brain short circuits.

“Fear Not Young Man!” The buff-armed-guy yells. “Why?” He asks to no one and then laughs. “For I Am Here!”

Tsuna turns around to see his captor and is met with a bright ensemble of tight spandex, gravity defying blonde hair and a glittery wide-mouthed smile. He blinks—once, then twice, then three times.

“What?” he shrieks.

The man who he is now going to call ‘Sparkles’ doesn’t respond to Tsuna’s half rhetorical question and jumps into the fight between Tree Guy and his guardians, serving as a beacon for Tsuna’s attention.

And once Sparkles enters the fight, his guardians aren’t exactly being used as mops or anything to clean the floor, but he knows that they’re also not doing well.

Tree Guy is pretty much down for the count with how he’s working at like 2 frames per minute because of Yamamoto, but Sparkles is impervious to apparently anything his guardians throw at him.

Despite how ridiculous looking and weird Sparkles is, he’s strong which Tsuna is beginning to think is a lazy pattern in the universe.

(Because Reborn looks like a baby and yeah, he’s Satan so weirder equals more dangerous. Unexpectedly, his intuition hums at his observation, and that is truly horrifying.)

Yamamoto douses the guy in rain flames, but he continues to move at an impossible speed, dodging Yamamoto and Gokudera’s attacks, which at this point are coordinated enough that Yamamoto isn’t slicing Gokudera’s dynamites in half, which isn’t to say that they’re /that/ coordinated but it also isn’t to say that they’re messing around.

In seconds, the alley is just a poor apocalyptic take of what it used to be. There’s large holes in the ground and both buildings that line the place are damaged, brick falling off the sides into large broken piles.

Tsuna can hear screams that are amplified through the narrow pathway, coming from either side of the alley.

And he’s just about to step in, hand already in his pocket to take a hyper dying will pill, when his head snaps a little to the side towards a far off building.

He’s squints and takes his time to look because his intuition pointed him in this direction, and rewarded by his efforts, he sees a lens flare.

It’s got to be like at least 1 km away. It’s half his intuition, half the fact that he knows Reborn and half his fear of the man, that he knows it’s Reborn on that building, looking through a scope.

His tutor is probably laying down, Leon-sniper-rifle propped up on the ledge, a finger on the trigger and a drink in his other hand, snickering to himself.

So he bites into the pill quickly and doesn’t hesitate, jumping safely down from the building and grabbing his two guardians.

He doesn’t think and acts on instinct when pulling his guardians out of harms way, completely unsurprised by the boom he hears as something breaks the sound barrier.

He dashes to the closest end of the alley, his flames propelling him, and grabbing onto Tree Guy, Sparkles goes the other direction.

Reborn’s bullet hits the epicenter of the alley-turned-fighting-arena and explodes in a flash of blinding yellow. The explosion is followed by the two buildings collapsing even further inward and completely blocking up the path.

Has Tsuna mentioned that Reborn is Satan and a bastard and crazy and that he hates him. Because if he hasn’t mentioned that, maybe he should’ve mentioned it.

Him and his guardians barely reach the edge of the explosion. And if it wasn’t for his intuition and speed, Gokudera would’ve been caught in the blast radius, Yamamoto would’ve been caught in the blast radius, he would’ve been caught in the blast radius.

Okay, to be fair the two hostiles would’ve been caught in the blast radius too, but at what cost. 

All three of them stumble and roll.

Gokudera and Yamamoto land on their feet despite the fact that they were tumbling out of Tsuna’s hands and were therefore at a disadvantage.

He hates them for a fraction of a second, before Gokudera yells, “TENTH! ARE YOU OKAY?” Because Tsuna, did in fact, crash face first into the concrete.

He lifts his head, still feeling calm from being in Hyper Dying Will Mode, and nods even though he can feel something drip down from his nose and onto his lip. Blood, he realizes when he tastes the copper.

Wiping it away, he says evenly, “We need to go. Gokudera lead us to base.”

At an actual command from their boss, the two wipe the stupid looks off their face and follow the pace set by Tsuna which is fast from the help of his dying will flames.

And Tsuna’s eternally grateful for at least that.

Despite everything else, his guardians do know when to get into gear when the situation call for it.

Tsuna almost wants to swear by a religion at that point because this has to be hard proof to an existence of a merciful god.

Then Gokudera ruins his faith by slapping Yamamoto on the back of the head and yelling. “Why the fuck did you stop running, Baseball Idiot! If you didn’t stop Tenth wouldn’t have gotten kidnapped or injured!”

Maybe if god did exist, it’s Reborn, and Leon is his first apostle, making Tsuna and his guardians the subsequent eight other ones… and that’s why his life sucks.

But that would make Jesus Reborn, and Reborn wasn’t a savior. If anything, after what happened at the beach, Tsuna might as well be Jesus. And Jesus wasn’t even a god to begin with. Right?

So that would make Tsuna Jesus and Reborn god and Leon something else, but his guardians would still be apostles and—

Tsuna shakes his head, that metaphor fell apart way too quickly, and he was way too dumb to be making biblical references anyways.

He sighs and drags his hand down his face about to say something to end the one-sided squabble when his intuition flares again.

He can’t catch a single break.

Literally.

If breaks were a fast ball going 160 kmh, he was himself trying to catch one in middle school pre-the-mafia ~~ruining his life.~~

Predictably, something crashes or rather lands loudly behind them, cement disintegrating into a small crater.

Behind them is Sparkles who’s ridiculous twinkling smile and spandex and gravity defying bright sunflower yellow hair is suddenly very terrifying with all the shadows over his face.

“Run,” Tsuna’s says still calmly and commanding, despite the fact that his heart rate just tripled, and every horror movie he’s ever watched (which granted are very few in number) replay in his head, replacing monsters with Sparkles.

His guardians don’t need to get told twice when they go like they’ve never gone before, all skipping the ground and flying, with aid from their flames.

He hears something crack, turns around and there’s another crater in the ground, one absent of Sparkles.

Then he hears whizzing getting closer and reluctantly, looks up and sees gravity pulling Sparkles back down to where Tsuna will be in a few seconds at the speed that he’s going.

Why him?

He shoves his guardians forward so that they can escape while he engages Sparkles, hopefully holding him long enough for the other two to get to base safely.

His intuition settles deep in his stomach which tells him it’s the worst move he’s ever made in his entire life.

Perhaps beating out that one time, he skipped out on paper work from Nono and used intuition to dodge Reborn  chasing him down, which lead to Reborn having to complete the paperwork for him. And then that lead to…

He didn’t think about it and instead stopped in his tracks falling into a fighting stance. Maybe after distracting him, Tsuna could escape too. Hopefully.

The dread in his stomach doesn’t disperse, but Hyper Dying Will Mode helps him shrug that off. Stay calm. It didn’t matter. If Tsuna did end up in prison-prison, his guardians would get him out. And maybe, the breakout wouldn’t be as disastrous as he thought it would be.

His intuition didn’t have to make a single move for Tsuna to know that was a pipe dream.

But surprisingly it did start doing cartwheels.

Before Sparkles makes it to the ground, a bullet hits him on the side and sends him, not far from where he was going to land, but far enough that he wouldn’t intercept their path completely.

More bullets follow the first one and Sparkles is still airborne enough for him to be affected by their impact, moving him farther and farther away from Tsuna and his guardians.

It’s probably Reborn providing long distance support, and he notes peripherally that Sparkles is an actual monster if he’s only just being moved by Reborn’s exploding bullets. Instead of, you know, disintegrating.

Tsuna doesn’t whoop, but his mouth twitches into a smirk which might as well be the same thing in Hyper Dying Will Mode.

Easily, he catches up to his guardians.

“Tenth, why did you push us out of the way?!”

“Tsuna we were supposed to rescue you. You can’t be left behind.”

Gokudera and Yamamoto say it at the same time, and even though Gokudera gives his rain a nasty look for “interrupting him,” his storm doesn’t break out in yells, both guardians’ attention aimed disapprovingly at him.

For a second, Tsuna can feel his dying will fading from the guilt and shame, but he holds onto his resolve.

“It was either me or both of you. I would do it again.”

And Tsuna realizes, yeah, he would.

“Tenth,” Gokudera says. He’s quieter and torn, his voice sounding like awe but his face scrunched in disapproval.

Yamamoto stays uncharacteristically silent, eyebrows furrowed in concentration and eyes sharp.

Tsuna sighs and his eyes soften as much as his Hyper Dying Will Mode will allow.

“I do it because I know if I was caught, everyone would come for me.”

Gokudera’s scrunched features disappear, and he’s back to smiles yelling “TENTH!” the wagging tail overlay amplifying. Tsuna doesn’t know if those are actual tears Gokudera wipes from his eyes or if it’s an act. He thinks it’s the former. Typical.

But Yamamoto doesn’t say anything, his frown lightens a little bit, but he still looks reluctant to accept Tsuna’s words.

And because his superpower is noticing minuscule details that could possibly offend Tsuna, Gokudera glares at his rain. “Oi! Baseball Idiot WHAT’S that look, HUH?! Tenth just said he trusts you!”

Yamamoto laughs. “Maa, maa Gokudera. I was getting around to it-” he lifts both of his arms in a placating gesture and tilts his head towards Tsuna- “Thanks for trusting us, Tsuna.”

It’s forced, but Tsuna doesn’t push it.

His rain was always weirdly perceptive about things like this, and he obviously knew that Tsuna words, although true, didn’t cover it all.

If he got captured it could mean prison, but it could also mean… something more permanent. His guardians, no matter how determined, weren’t always going to be on time, and if it was an enemy who truly wanted to kill Tsuna… well, maybe his guardians wouldn’t be given the opportunity to “come for him.”

It’s easy to mask this though, focusing on the task ahead of them.

Gokudera has been leading their escape only a step ahead of the other two to guide their direction, and even during their conversation they’ve been zigzagging through alley ways, being airborne only a few meters up as to be shielded from view by buildings.

Tsuna’s Storm guardian wasn’t deemed a genius for nothing, and even through the serious conversation, he was still trying to lose anyone tailing them.

Tsuna approves. Better safe than sorry.

Because of their path, they are not exactly far from where they’ve started. Tsuna knows because he can still hear commotion from the civilians yelling and Reborn’s loud bullets distantly making it’s explosive mark.

There’s none of that loud whizzing sound of someone jumping and dropping from the air, so Tsuna knows that Reborn’s at least kept Sparkles on the ground via vicious onslaught of projectiles.

His tutor must be pissed, though, because if he’s still shooting that means Sparkles is still standing and to still be standing after multiple shots from the number one hitman. That’s a direct challenge.

“Speed up, Gokudera. Reborn’s holding Sparkles back, and I have a feeling there’s more to come.”

His intuition is what forces him to say that. There’s still a sinking feeling in his stomach that points to danger ahead. The longer they stay on the streets, looking like obvious criminals, the harder it was going to be to escape.

“YES TENTH!”

So Gokudera decreases the amount of zig zagging they do, and then they enter a more suburban neighborhood where they slow down to a sedate pace.

Wiping as much grime and shattered brick from their person, all three of them do their best to fit in, and Tsuna lets his will go, turning into the most normal looking (albeit dirty) of the three.

To his utter dismay, Gokudera and Yamamoto open a gate into a walled in house with the name “Nakamura” on the front. It’s a two story white and industrial brick mixed home, non-descript and something he’s seen a lot of, and definitely, not abandoned.

His intuition is the only thing that pushes him into the house as his mouth hangs open, an inviting home to many flies.  

On auto-pilot he slips off his shoes and puts on worn in blue slippers at the entrance of the house. He can’t believe (or maybe he can believe) that his guardians just stole a house from some random Nakamura family. And he knows they stole it because the place was dangerously well-kept to have been any sort of abandoned. 

The living room in view from the entrance holds Mukuro and Lambo, and he blinks, feeling like he’s floating absently in an alternate dimension. Mukuro’s legs are propped up comfortably on the coffee table, and Lambo is shaking in near tears on the other side of the couch, a dramatic gap between the two. 

Mukuro pops a chip into his mouth from a bowl cradled between his legs and his torso and gives Tsuna a lazy smirk. “Oh welcome back, Tsunayoshi-kun or should I say terrorist-kun!”

“Oi!! DON’T CALL TENTH A TERRORIST! TENTH IS BETTER THAN THAT! HE’S A-”

Tsuna doesn’t pay attention to Gokudera’s next words when his eyes land on the pretty news reporter on the giant TV that Mukuro is watching.

_“Today at approximately 11:00, seven teens escaped capture after blowing up Dagobah Municipal Beach Park. Witnesses say that two toddlers were with them. One of teens was caught and after being questioned by the police, was released.”_

A picture of Tsuna is then popped up on the screen where he’s still passed out and propped up on a chair, drool dripping down his mouth because he was probably snoring. This must have been taken when he was captured after being used as a scapegoat. How long was he sleeping there looking like that? 

He feels heat rush to his face, but he doesn't have much time to be embarrassed when the picture disappears, replaced once again by the pretty news reporter talking. 

_“That same teen and two others are believed to be the terrorists that-“_

Tsuna screams and runs towards the coffee table practically falling all over the thing as he scrambles to turn off the TV.

“That’s- that’s,” he breaths and grabs the hair on his head. “That’s not true.”

Mukuro gives him a sardonic raised brow, and Lambo further curls into the couch, scared, like he wants to disappear into the cushions.

“Tsuna-nii is a terrorist?”

“I’m not,” Tsuna says frantically.

Does Lambo really believe that? Is he scared of Tsuna?

Then Lambo’s head lolls to the side, and he starts picking his nose. “What’s a terrorist?”

Lambo almost had Tsuna there. For a second, he really thought his lightening was terrified of him, that little-

“Of course Tenth’s not a terrorist, you dumb cow, I just said that-“ Tsuna turns his head to Gokudera, a relieved smile on his face. He’s glad at least Gokudera has- “He’s the Vongola boss-“ and then he slumps forward, all hope loss.

Yamamoto laughs and slaps Tsuna on the back, making his face smush up against the glass coffee table.

“Yeah, of course he’s not! He’s our boss!”

“BASEBALL IDIOT WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO TENTH’S PREC-“

He feels tears welling in his eyes and hears something snap in the backyard and fall with a loud thump, sending him further and further into despair as his storm and rain go at it once again.

Why did he even expect anything from his guardians at this point?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry that this has come so late, and I really don't have any excuses other than this chapter was a pain to write, and I lost inspo. I really shouldn't have planned for it be this chaotic because, yikes. 
> 
> Anyways, hope you enjoyed the chapter, thank you for listening to my Ted Talk.


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